Father’s Day is usually one of the least controversial holidays on the calendar. For most families, it’s a straightforward occasion: call dad, fire up the grill, hand over a gift, and spend a few hours appreciating the role fathers play in their children’s lives.
Naturally, that simplicity was too much for The New York Times.
Instead of focusing on fathers in the traditional sense, the paper’s opinion section published an illustrated essay by Zach Ellams titled “What I Learned About Parenting as a Trans Dad.” The piece, which also appeared under the headline “To My Daughter, My Gender Was Never Complicated,” recounts Ellams’ experience raising a daughter after transitioning.
“I thought I was teaching Elliott to be happy and secure, yet she was doing that for me.” https://t.co/PLmcvK6lZf
— Brad LaPlante (@bradlapgov) June 21, 2026
The essay unfolds through a series of illustrated panels. Ellams describes living as a transgender man since age 18 and reflects on conversations with a young daughter who learns about her parent’s past identity and transition. The daughter asks questions that children naturally ask when confronted with concepts they are trying to understand.
One exchange stands out. The child asks, “How did you grow a mustache if you were a lady?” It’s the kind of blunt, literal question that only a young child would ask, cutting through layers of adult terminology and political framing.
The New York Times published cartoons for Father’s Day about a “trans dad” and his young daughter asking how long he had breasts for.
This is exactly the kind of woke ideology Elon Musk has been speaking out against.
For years, Elon has warned about the woke mind virus… pic.twitter.com/6X2o0Lkvqz
— DogeDesigner (@cb_doge) June 21, 2026
Throughout the piece, Ellams portrays the daughter as accepting and curious rather than confused or distressed. The essay’s central theme is that children often approach complicated adult issues with a level of openness and directness that many adults lose over time.
Critics, however, have focused less on the family story itself and more on the decision to feature it on Father’s Day.
For those readers, the issue isn’t simply the existence of transgender parents. It’s the symbolic choice made by one of the nation’s most influential newspapers. On a day traditionally devoted to celebrating fathers, the paper’s most prominent Father’s Day-themed commentary centered on a transgender parent rather than a conventional discussion of fatherhood.
That editorial decision has become the real story.
And they wonder why Donald Trump was elected…
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To My Daughter, My Gender Was Never Complicated https://t.co/6YZUzFpqh5— Tunku Varadarajan (@tunkuv) June 21, 2026
The controversy reflects a broader cultural divide that has played out repeatedly over the last decade. Supporters see stories like Ellams’ as part of a wider effort to represent different family structures and experiences. Critics view them as examples of institutions redefining longstanding concepts such as motherhood, fatherhood, and family in ways that many Americans neither requested nor support.
What makes the debate particularly intense is that both sides believe they’re defending something important. One side sees inclusion and recognition. The other sees the erosion of traditional meanings and cultural norms.
I want to congratulate @nytimes for perfectly catching how the cultural elite view men and fatherhood this Father’s Day – yes, to the Times, being a dad is something you do to feel better about having your tits cut off. Cannot make it up. pic.twitter.com/kKuxaPE3AJ
— Alex Berenson (@AlexBerenson) June 21, 2026
The essay’s final exchange has also drawn attention. As the two stand together, the daughter tells Ellams, “Maybe I’ll be like you when I grow up.”
“Oh, yeah?” Ellams responds.
“Yeah. Really short.”
It’s a joke that lands because it is entirely disconnected from the larger ideological discussion surrounding the piece. For a moment, the child isn’t thinking about identity politics, social theory, or cultural battles. She’s just being a kid.
Ironically, that may be the most revealing part of the entire essay.
